Monday, June 25, 2007

In Praise of Men

After my feminist rant, I thought I would even up the debate - and with a nod in the direction of Kahless's witchy question and the pertinent comment left by Craig I want to talk about my perspective on men.

Men - wonderful, warm, sensuous, solid men.

I like a bad boy - now being a bad boy and being a neanderthal, knuckle dragging 'are you lookin at my bird' type of man are two different things entirely. Bad boys are intelligent, they are wily, they are witty and capable. They may even own a weapon or two, but they epitomise the things I like about men. They dont really give a flying f**k what anybody thinks. The real man is a man who dances, he is a man who sings, he is a man who laughs and loves, he can provide, and is empowered by his own earthiness. He feels.

In the witchy world The Green Man, Cernunnos, Herne, the god, is the male counterpart to the Goddess, he is her consort and her love. The Lord to the Lady. He understands his own sexuality and he is not afraid to use it.

Earthy, lovely, sweaty, hairy men! See I do like them, honest I do.

I like it that men don't get rattled by stuff. I like the way they smell. I like their strength, the shoulders!

And ....They are such less trouble than us girlie's. My son has had tribes of mates over to stay during his youth. Never any trouble. They have been packed into his room like sardines, all testosterone and skin issues, never once had to shush them, never once had to ask them to clean up their stuff, never once had to sort out a drama. My daughter on the other hand had 4 of her friends over for a sleep over this weekend - well! Pandemonium. Various sobbing females on the landing at 4am, one of them was sick, none of them were talking to each other in the morning. Nightmare! Give me adolescent males any day!

Talking of adolescent males - it was the boys at school who made it worth while. The naughty behaviour, the fun, the cheekiness of them. Men are great! Its always the boys that pass the singing books out of the window at school, who stuff each other in the cupboards under the science benches, who fart in class without a care and find it funny. Its the boys that do the funniest things - I love 'em. So so sad that they get all burdened down by responsibility when its the laughing spirit of them that makes us girlie's love them, well me anyway. Whats the point of nagging? its the slow death of any relationship. Men have to breathe, they have to live even if the bathroom needs tiling. Hey sister, go learn how to do it yourself!

There are lots of things to love about men, whether you like having relationships with them, or prefer women, I stand in praise of men ...

The deep voices, the gentle but strong hands, the way they talk to women about real stuff and they talk to each other about crap! (and moan about the fact that this is the case).

Befriend a man, understand a man and you will see his soul.


Pixie said...

They are gorgeous, some of the time, especially when i really want a shag. The ones I love are the ones who are emotionally literate big time. And I can't tile but i can use a drill and unblock drains.

DJ Kirkby said...

What a great post!

Böbø said...

You seem to be having a bit of a double bind moment on poor men.

You castigate (in an earlier post) abusive men who obviously "don't really give a flying f**k what anybody thinks" ... I think that's spelt "fuck" by the way.

Yet demand that they be "bad boys" who "don't really give a flying f**k what anybody thinks".

And then praising your son for being "such less trouble" (presumably a good boy), and want your men to be solid and capable (surely not characteristics easily promoted in men who "don't really give a flying f**k what anybody thinks")

What about the nice men? Worthless wimps, presumably? Yet it is nice men who are more likely to be emotionally literate (why do emotions if you "don't really give a flying f**k what anybody thinks"). Less likely to abuse you. More likely to be solid and capable and, well, actually care what the fuck you think.

Perhaps as well as tiling, you ought to stop disowning your own naughty side and projecting it on to men. Get wicked and don't give a fuck yourself, sister ;-)

Queen Vixen said...

You know I like good boys bobo, dont play coy. The flying f**k (original spelling)is about the male capacity to not care if person driving behind is cross because they are reversing into a parking spot, or the ability to say no to a telephone sales call without thinking about his poor starving children, or the carte blanche to turn down an invitation because he doesnt want to go without any concern for the hostesses feelings. Those are the kinds of brave things I admire.

As for the other type of moronic individual who does not give a flying fuck if he abuses, and rants and is totally ignorant of anyone or anything beyond his little sphere of operation. Well I am not interested in that type of bloke, or indeed a female displaying the same qualities.

Nice men are not worthless wimps, not at all! I am in praise of the gentler qualities of men.

I know this is a sore point for you bobo, avoiding beaches like you do for fear of what might happen but I stand by my feelings. Men and our expectations of men are always going to be a little confused (just look at our fathers) but the same goes for you chaps. What do you want in a woman, bet you say one thing and moan like hell if you get it.

My son is a good boy, not a hooligan, but he is relaxed in his own skin, and very confident. I encourage him to not give the flying f**k in a responsible way.

and the less said about my naughty side the better.

Böbø said...

Moi, coy? {fluttering eyebrows}

Oh well, so long as you're not suggesting that bad boys are good and good boys are bad. Which is just all too confusing.

Which case I'm happy to be classed as bad. Well a bit bad. I can do those "couldn't give a fuck" things. And be gentle too.

As for what I want from women. Hhhmmm, don't think I can manage that in a quick comment space.

"Not give the flying f**k in a responsible way" sounds the way of the future.

But you leave my sore points alone and we'll draw a discreet veil over you naughty side.

♥ x ♥

Queen Vixen said...

Pixie: Yes, they are gorgeous - and looking forward to your post on the whole subject. The 's'word ...shhhh

dj: Cheers me dears.

Bobo: Agreed! Truce sounds good to me.

Pixie said...

QV I'm a bit perturbed I sent you a comment and it's disapppeared.

It was a comment about how I felt that BOBO was having a go at you.

I know you wouldn't have got rid of it , have you got a gremlin?

Böbø said...

Me ... having a go!

Like I give a f**k


♥ x ♥

Pixie said...

AND who dont you give a fuck about BOBO, your beautiful friend QV or .... me? It isn't quite clear?

Böbø said...

I'm just practising being bad as per QV instructions. You know you're both special to me. (Though I was teasing QV, actually)


Kahless said...

I don't think I'll add to the debate. Just popping in to say 'hi'.