Monday, August 27, 2007

The Interview

Ok, so Kahless asked me five questions and I have already answered one, so the next one is

How did you get into being a masseur?

When I had kids I made a decision to stay at home with them and bring them up. Mr Vixen was climbing the corporate ladder so I retreated to the home to be a stop at home Mum. I still believe it was the best thing to do for them, they are fabulous young adults and very settled, confident etc. It was the right choice for them however I did not fare so well. I was depressed and got into thinking that I was going to die. It took ten years to diagnose me with depression. What finally did it was the poltergeist activity.

Wierd things started to happen, and the rest of the family got really freaked out about it. I used to be able to turn on tellies and stereos when I was distressed. Things randomly fell out of cupboards and I used to turn on the shower just by walking past the room. One day I returned from shopping, put my car keys on the table, bought in the shopping and when I picked up my keys they had all bent over, like they had melted. I got my ass down the docs and was sent to a therapist (I think you can work out who that was) who amongst other things told me I was bored! She was right - she was so so so right. She also suggested that I look at my book collection to see what I was naturally interested in. The big themes were myths, legends and magick, cookery and complementary therapies. I had done enough bloody cooking, so I opted for the complementary therapies.

The first thing I did was to look into courses at my local college. I wanted night classes because I was still needed for childcare. There was an Aromatherapy course I was interested in. I signed up, it was daunting after being away from things for so long but I did enjoy it. I was good at it too, it was an NVQ and I passed without a problem earning a Certificate in Swedish Body Massage. The second year of the course was Aromatherapy but by then I realised that I needed more of a challenge. I needed more depth, and was getting interested in healing and energy. I found a Diploma course in Holistic Aromatherapy and joined it. It was my first taste of weekend study and it was the course that changed my life. I met my first witch on that course, and I went away on a residential stay for the first time since I was 14. Suddenly I realised that there was life outside of the home and the church.

I passed my Diploma and am a Professional Aromatherapist but that was not enough either. My therapist advised me to think about becoming a therapist myself - my third category of interest on my book shelf was myth, magick and legend; The stories of the subconscious, the commentaries of the human condition. I signed up for a Masters Degree in psychotherapy and here I am, almost there. Its been an incredible journey and I am unrecognisable from the woman I once was. Massage got me started on that road.

Imagine you are a champion sportswoman. What sport would you excel at and why this one?

Archery. That was the immediate response. I have never held a bow, but have a bow and arrows on my birthday list, a native American set. Perhaps its because I am a Sagittarius and have always identified with the Archer. Plus I like working with Artemis energy, the virgin goddess who hunted in the forest with her bow. I guess it fits with my interest in ancient times. If society collapsed, being able shoot an accurate arrow would come in handy.

Tell us about one of your favourite books.

Ludo and the Star Horse by Mary Stewart. I first heard this on Jackanory - yes I liked Jackanory, it was great! I remember being enchanted. Spell bound. I still read it regularly. It plots the journey of a young boy through the star country of the 12 signs of the zodiac. Ludo accompanies his horse through the twelve houses to catch the sun. The only chance for his horse to survive is to catch the sun, and be harnessed to the solar chariot - otherwise he will die. Ludo enters the star country in the house of the Archer, Sagittarius. He then travels through all of the houses meeting the 'Lords' of the house on his way. Some are benevolent some cruel. He learns so much on his journey and grows as an individual. His loyalty is rewarded in the house of the Scorpion, when he is allowed to return to the real world and his companion passes through death to become immortal and pull the chariot of the sun. Ludo returns home; he is found in the snow - he has been buried in an avalanche and as he looks to the sky he sees his horse gallop across the dark expanse and into the dawn, his golden shoe striking sparks from the top of the mountain. It always makes me cry. It is of course one of those script stories that appealed to me because it resonates with my life path. As well as the obvious astrological and mystical setting it describes a journey through life, the ups and downs and how sometimes we all need someone to travel along side so that we can achieve our dreams.

Tell us about one of your proudest achievements outside of your family.

I think all of the above qualifies. Getting back onto my true path. Being able to meet old school friends and hold my head up high, to know that I have fulfilled my potential at last. Being a mental health professional, working in the NHS - having a busy Private Practice. I am so proud of what I have achieved. Its all the more important to me knowing that I came from such a place of despair to do it. I am proud of that. When I actually graduate with my Masters degree it will be a dream come true. Then comes the PhD - I want the title!

So there it is. If anyone wants to do an interview email me and i will come up with 5 questions. Thanks Kahless - I have enjoyed it.


l-q-s said...

Wow! I read that and now I feel immensely proud of you. :) I have the greatest of admiration for any woman who can stay at home with her children 24/7. I went back to work when my daughter was 7 months old and my son was just 2. I thought I would lose my mind if I didn't have some adult company and I have never felt more trapped and dull than I did in that time. It wasn't their fault of course, and there were plenty of other issues going on at the time but I felt like such a failure, not being able to cope.

It's reading things like this that make me feel like I have so much that I want to do and learn. I feel like I lost the plot so much in my 20's, having the kids (which I don't regret for a second but who do make things a bit more challenging from a returning to education perspective) and going from one job to another in an industry that I have no affinity with. I think it's part of why I'm so excited at the prospect of turning 30 in November - feels like turning the page into a brand new chapter, hopefully a little wiser than before!

My inner attention-whore would like to take this opportunity to say, "Gimme questions! I love questions!" Please feel free to ignore her. :)

Kahless said...

I am glad that you enjoyed doing this Dr QV.

I enjoyed reading it and its given me a whole set of new questions I'd love to ask you! And I'm dying to know more about the poltergeist activity. Actually, I noticed that the lower I am, the more intuitive (for want of a better word) I am. Strange.

When DJ interviewed me, I posted on my Lite blog. If you would like, please feel free to send me five questions and I will answer them on random. Don't mind what you ask.

Hedgewizard said...

Love that post - love it! How are you getting on with Kate West's book?

Pixie said...

I'm so bloody proud of you and so glad I stopped being your therapist years ago. As you are such a wonderful friend.and I'd be lost without you.
Can i come see you graduate??

DJ Kirkby said...

Yikes! Telekenisis? Scary. You still do that stuff now or just back then? How was the moot, did I miss the post on that?

wakeupandsmellthecoffee said...

What a fascinating life you lead! I've been thinking about doing a remedial massage course but haven't found the right one yet. It is boring being a stay-at-home mum, yet rewarding. Wished I'd had a blog back when mine were smaller. Would have saved me a lot of angst.

Queen Vixen said...

l-q-s: I feel touched by your words. Glad I am not the only one who felt like this about staying at home. Its taken me years to deal with the guilt of not enjoying the experience. I found myself in my 30's and I am sure you will too. I will invent some questions and email them, providing there is an email address on your blog of course. So your questions go on my to do list. Thanks again for such great feed back.

K: Oh yes, yes, yes - give me some more 'Dr QV' thats what I am after. Feel free to ask more questions, you have my email. The poltergeist was scary, also took me years to work out that distressed teenagers generally create such disturbances and I was most deffinately stuck at 14! I shall come up with some random questions for you - hey this is good fun! They may be 'dark' in keeping with the nature of Random Kahless. May be.

Hedge: Why thank you kind sir! Tis my pleasure to entertain.

I have thoroughly enjoyed the Kate West book, although it is for beginners which I like to think I am not, I found it invaluable. I did a workshop with Kate a couple of years ago - she is a formidable woman!

Pix: Thank you again - and glad you are proud, of course you can come to my graduation!

DJ: I occasionally can command such powers lol when I do I take a long hard look at what is 'crap' in my life and sort it out. That does the trick. I am a fairly magnetic sort of a gal and electrical stuff does get affected from time to time. The moot is next week (eek!) I shall tell you all about it.

Queen Vixen said...

Wake up: How right you are. A blog would have been a god send. I am reaping my rewards now I think, so proud of my kids - so proud that they are embracing independance with total confidence.

l-q-s said...

I often feel that mothers-to-be should be warned that as well as all the heart-warming, cooing over your baby etc, etc, motherhood, especially in the very early years, can be a deeply lonely experience. Which isn't to say that it isn't worth it, just that it is something that a lot of women battle with and quite often feel they can't express for fear of ridicule/dismissal/being labelled as an awful mum.

There have been several incidences in Ireland in recent years of mothers killing their children and themselves and it breaks my heart to think that, were society a little less wrapped up in it's ideal and images of perfect families, these women might have gotten the help and support that they so desperately needed. And when fewer and fewer women are staying home to look after their children, the one's who do have less backup than they have had in previous preriods of history. It's a dangerous thing for society in general and for many individuals also, of course.

Have added e-mail to profile just in case it wasn't visible previously! *wanders off trying to hide excitement*

Queen Vixen said...

l-q-s: I totally agree. It is the best kept secret in the world. So much idealisation and fantasy does get created around motherhood. The reality is very different. Hard slog, lonliness and that kind of numbing brain dead feeling that creeps over you in the absense of stimulating adult company. Of course there are the positives too but I think that most women (and guys that take a really active role) are led to believe it is All positve and are totally unprepared for the truth. What you are saying is important to me. The extended family and support network is not there in today's society, for those parents that choose to stay home it can be bleak and support is needed.

Am already mulling over your questions :o)