Thursday, October 23, 2008

One last thing to do ...

Over recent years I have been ironing out the creases in my life. Sorting out all the things that were unresolved. Getting to a place where I am truly happy and feeling pretty ecstatic all the time. Believe me - I am there, and its fantastic!

Just one enigma remains - one little mystery that I seem quite unable to deal with. My weight. Getting to a reasonable, healthy, OK weight has eluded me. Sure I have done Weight Watchers and Slimming World - duly lost all I should but then back it goes. I have got Paul McKennas system - eminently sensible until you consider that eating when hungry might actually mean tucking into a prawn salad in the middle of a patients emotional disclosure. Can you imagine it ... "Would you mind holding on to that sadness, I will be with you in a minute right after my meal" ... mmm just a tad impractical.

I have been told, and I think he is right, that I am manifesting a struggle with weight. Because I believe I cannot do it then I am creating a reality that means I cant. I know that I have to get my mind sorted out on this one ... but how?

I have visualised, affirmed, pledged, confronted, encouraged contamination free autonomy but to no avail.

No good affirming my sexy slimness while scarfing down a bag of chips and cider (groan)!

Planning is the key - motivating myself to get off the sofa and prepare tomorrows salad. I am an expert on food science, nothing is confusing me as far as knowledge is concerned.

I am about to face another festive season - I would rather be able to get into my size 14 spangly mini skirt than look like the proverbial xmas pudding!

All diets start on a Monday so I will heave myself back onto the wagon next week - having self administered all the intensive psychotherapuetic techniques that I can dredge up over the weekend.

Wish me luck!

PS I am only 11 stone 13 - and 5 foot 7 - its not vast but its more of a (butter) mountain than a molehill.


Queen Vixen said...

My Boobs alone weigh 8lbs - so does that count?

Kahless said...

Yes it does!!!

Personally I dont think you need to diet so fuck it... why diet???

Its boring!!
Well non calorie food is boring.

Sorry, probably no help!!

Mei Del said...

i'm in awe of your boob weight. what i hate about diets is that the boobs are the first to shrink.

when i met you at fire byrd's you looked fab. but i know what you mean about waning to fit into things. when we've been a smaller size than we are now, for some reason we want to return to it.

i'm sure instead of dieting if we can b happy with whatever we are now that should be alright too?

Fire Byrd said...

you know the rules.... eat what you want just less of it! it is a mind set though. cause once you're mind allows you do to this without resentment then it embraces it. For me when I feel the rolls are getting out of hand I do the above and cut out butter and butter, bread and boooze for a week..... but still eat a little choc.
works for me!
Anyway your gorgeous whatever size you are. And I hang out with your mind and soul not your stomach!!!

Trixie said...

You are HARDLY overweight, but it is harder just to lose a few pounds than a few stone. Believe me I know this. I found it easier to lose 8 stone than to lose 8 pound!

Anonymous said...

Good luck!! C:)

Queen Vixen said...

Kahless: It helps! I have been thinking fuck diets for a while - its only the xmas outfit that has made me rethink. Perhaps I should just buy another!

Mei: My boobs are impressive. Tis true and they do tend to stay in proportion so I am rather fortunate.

Fire: Thank you! I do know the rules. Today I did decide to eat when hungry. So far I have managed to eat half a mango, some grapes and a yoghurt. Looks like I have been over eating big style

Trix: you are so right - never thought of it like that but that could be the reason I struggle

Craig: Thanks matey! I will succeed this time!

Lady in red said...

I am glad all diets start on monday because right now its friday and I need to eat

oh and don't think I didn't think of the inuendos whilst I was writing my post

Nick said...

Sorry, can't help you there, I'm one of those infuriating people who's always been thin and can never overeat because it makes me feel quite ill. Anyway, why worry what weight you are unless you're life-threateningly vast?

"Would you mind holding on to that sadness, I'll be with you after my meal" - priceless!

sunny day said...

Giving up that cider will be difficult my buxom friend


darth sardonic said...

ah this is a constant battle. believe me i know exactly how it goes. i still have about 15 to 20 pounds i could just give someone.

DJ Kirkby said...

Hmmmm I bet you look much slimmer than you believe yourself to be.

Exmoorjane said...

I am TOTALLY with you. I could have written this post except that I'm an inch taller and over a stone heavier...
If you find the solution, let me know!
How did you weigh your boobs? Mine are vast but I have no idea how much they weigh.....