Thursday, October 23, 2008
One last thing to do ...
Over recent years I have been ironing out the creases in my life. Sorting out all the things that were unresolved. Getting to a place where I am truly happy and feeling pretty ecstatic all the time. Believe me - I am there, and its fantastic!
Just one enigma remains - one little mystery that I seem quite unable to deal with. My weight. Getting to a reasonable, healthy, OK weight has eluded me. Sure I have done Weight Watchers and Slimming World - duly lost all I should but then back it goes. I have got Paul McKennas system - eminently sensible until you consider that eating when hungry might actually mean tucking into a prawn salad in the middle of a patients emotional disclosure. Can you imagine it ... "Would you mind holding on to that sadness, I will be with you in a minute right after my meal" ... mmm just a tad impractical.
I have been told, and I think he is right, that I am manifesting a struggle with weight. Because I believe I cannot do it then I am creating a reality that means I cant. I know that I have to get my mind sorted out on this one ... but how?
I have visualised, affirmed, pledged, confronted, encouraged contamination free autonomy but to no avail.
No good affirming my sexy slimness while scarfing down a bag of chips and cider (groan)!
Planning is the key - motivating myself to get off the sofa and prepare tomorrows salad. I am an expert on food science, nothing is confusing me as far as knowledge is concerned.
I am about to face another festive season - I would rather be able to get into my size 14 spangly mini skirt than look like the proverbial xmas pudding!
All diets start on a Monday so I will heave myself back onto the wagon next week - having self administered all the intensive psychotherapuetic techniques that I can dredge up over the weekend.
Wish me luck!
PS I am only 11 stone 13 - and 5 foot 7 - its not vast but its more of a (butter) mountain than a molehill.