It was full moon on the 22nd and as is my habit I pulled my symbols for the lunar month. My animal guide - the Eagle, and my Goddess, Sophia - Goddess of wisdom.
I enjoy focusing my mind on what these symbols represent. I could witter on about the astral plane, and thought creating matter and how we form God/Goddess in our own image but I wont - you have heard me do that before. Instead I shall just say that I am working with Sophia energy at the moment and in a meditative moment I had a flash of inspiration - I need to love me.
From the moment you enter
till the time you surrender to death
all that you experience
directly for yourself
all the burnt fingers
to discover the fire is hot
all the falling flat
when your reach exceeds your grasp
all the explorations
of territory known and unknown
all these are pathways to me
Seek to know
and you are me
stretch to become
and you are me
The Feminine quests for wisdom
The Feminine is part of all women
all women are the Goddess
all women have wisdom
all women are Sophia
Amy Sophia Marashinksky
I need to stop worrying about men and relationships;I also need to stop pouring garbage into my body in the form of fatty foods and alcohol. I need to cherish my body - without it I would have nowhere to live!
On top of this wonderfully grounded realisation came the discovery of meditation 'proper'. By that I mean true Buddhist style. I am no Buddhist and do not wish to embrace that path but a lot of what they say makes sense. Especially as my mind is like a 50,000 volt energy surge most of the time. Calming it down is the best way for me to attain equilibrium right now.So the upshot ... dear readers. In the midst of my current turmoil I am finding a still place, and I would like to enlist your help in my quest to attain a healthy weight.
I am going to post my weight every week so that I can have something to aim for. I was 11 stone 12lbs on Monday - I am 5 foot 7 so that makes me overweight. Yesterday I ate well and exercised, meditated and felt so much more centred. I shan't lose my Wiccan joy in the sensual pleasures of the body, or the Queen Vixen boot stomping sparkle but for now the soothing salve of the quiet mind is what I need.
PS I sneaked a peek at the scales today and I have lost 3lbs already - yes I know its water and stuff, but its a great start.
